Ahhh just simply feel like writing them down in case I forget you know,
There are way too many times I wish to achieve in the coming future but baby steps I will do it slowly, nailing all down one by one.
First let me talk about life achievement,
I used to have many many things I wish to achieve and complete especially when I'm still enjoying the oh-so-great uni life but slowly I come to notice that it's impossible with so many limitations around.
1. Complete my Japanese language study
I talked about this endless time for many years already, I have yet to tick it off my wishlist. The reason being I don't think I have enough love for it like what I have for Korean. Time shouldn't be an issue if I really love something, so I think my love for it is not great enough for me to make sacrifices for it over other things. But I know I will check this off sooner or later, it's just a matter of "when"?
2. Do something meaningful to someone/myself
Meaningful I mean by something life-changing, I'm not a kind hearted person I need to admit this and sometimes hated myself for revealing the ugly and evil inner sides. I personally feel disgusted by it la and I really wanna throw this part of myself away, and focus only on the positivity. It's easier said than done really, it's never easy to just erase something that has been inside of you for so long, I try to be nice try to be patient try to be as easy as it needs, it's not working that well yet I suppose. By taking this huge step of accepting I ain't saint, ain't angel but a devil in heart, it's something so overwhelming and I sometimes choose to run away from it. Embracing and admitting to your own faults/flaws has never been easy, to me and to many others. I'm trying...
3. Somehow find out what I'm really good at
Okay about this I have no idea to be honest, you can say I'm pretty good at most of the things and also pretty bad at them. I mean I'm just a so so person. I don't know what I'm really good at, zero confidence. The only I know, I love words I love reading I love writing. BUT I certainly know I'm not good enough for it. And again I'm trying, maybe not now but 10 or 15 years later who knows? 4. Gather enough courage to pick up what's been missed
I wouldn't tell, so you guess. If you know me enough ;)
Ok, now I'm done with the serious part.. quite. Some silly and stupid thoughts I have in mind, don't judge la I know most of the girls do. Some quite serious still la not as the one above, hmm just something I wish to do.
1. I wanna be financially stable to support my ever-growing shopaholic inner soul
I shop so much I don't even want to stop, I wish I can buy everything I see and I love. Every girl's dream la k?
2. I wish I would stop aging (which is of course IMPOSSIBRUUU)
I'm starting to seek for anti-aging products everywhere, any nice or good brand intro please! Especially those which help to reduce wrinkles, way too many around my eyes. Oh yea, and better skin complexion, had enough of the acne man!
3. I wish to grow this platform to a bigger family
I really love sharing my thoughts to other people although I hate the consequences of affecting people's life in the end. Whatever you think is right to take in, you filter yourself. I don't like faking myself to be an angel, this is my own space anyway *smirks* So far my posts have yet to contain vulgarities, still safe no worries.
I wish I can have more time to manage this space, so that it won't be dead in awhile again. Dead way to many times hor, die so many times how can?
Omg it has been so so so long since my last blogpost, more than a year already to be exact. And within these few months, I kinda lost my interest in writing yea.. so I decided to take a break from this blogging thing. Somehow I switched my ranting space to dayre, so in a way I'm still writing but not as formal and not as much as before.
As I believe writing is suppose to be made my hobby, something that makes me happier instead of making me get cautious or feel worried to be judged or commented by others. I lost myself a little too as I noticed my writing style changed, I was getting more careful in my words and somewhat started sugarcoating my life too. I definitely disliked seeing myself that way so the long hiatus was probably a great decision.
What makes me feel like reviving this space?
Spotted some really nice blogspot templates by chance and I really wanna use them but I don't think they are appropriate nor suit with the style of my educational/portfolio blog so k la I think maybe I can bring some joy and lives back here.
Will I still update as much as before?
I can't guarantee this as my life is pretty much as hectic as usual, endless nights working on assignments and stuffs. But I will see, I will write something whenever I want to just no nice photos/images all time la so bear with it.
Do I still enjoy writing?
Yes, I still do. Just that I switched the whole thing to a smaller and less noticed platform as I got more uncomfortable revealing my life to others. In a way I'm getting more conscious about the affections I might bring to them who read my posts, be it good or bad I just don't feel comfortable bearing the responsibilities.
What should I write about then for the coming posts?
I think of focusing on topics that benefit others, more on reviews, thoughts and personal comments/feelings. I realized that some bloggers/bloggers-wannabe out there are getting less and less sincere, they make everything look extra nice and pretty when they are actually not. Of course I'm talking about the minority here, I still love bloggers like Audrey, Timothy Tiah and Cheesie as you can feel the effort they put into every single post they wrote, they don't sugar coat the reality, write or post nice photos just to make them look nice. I'm actually sicked of reading those fantasized and exaggerated posts already.
So I will just try my best to voice out what I really think/feel about something, someone. This is the one thing I can promise la, to whoever still willing to read my blog loooo.